photo courtesy of Rob & Lynn McFaul
This just in… Winnie-the-Pooh and his friends in the Hundred Acre Wood have been seized by H1N1 Panic and taking no chances have isolated and quarantined Piglet!
Pooh’s lovable friend and side-kick was spared no sympathy as many residents are blaming him for the entire swine flu pandemic! Late Friday night (Devil’s Night), Piglet’s friends and neighbours, overcome by the influences of the almost full moon and the media scare tactics surrounding the current H1N1 Pandemic, took it upon themselves to kidnap and isolate their good friend Piglet fearing that they might all contract Swine Flu from their association with their former friend.
Donning n95 surgical masks and vinyl gloves to protect themselves the mob came upon the unsuspecting piglet while he was getting a drink from the neighbourhood well. The 5 member gang had little difficulty capturing and binding little piglet who is now locked away in isolation from everyone. Residents have had to ship in drinking water until testing on the well can be completed.
Repeated attempts to gain further information have been met by ‘No comment’ from Piglet’s neighbour, Rabbit. When asked his thoughts, Eeyore simply replied, “Were all gonna die anyway.”
An inside source reported that Piglet was heard to be simply repeating, “Oh dddear!” over and over and over…
The government has been alerted and Health Canada is sending in a team consisting of scientists, doctors and nurses. The community vitally needs to be educated, and we will also offer them all the H1N1 vaccine so they can rest easy and allow their neighbour to return to the community without fear!
